Regarding the status of men and women in Teochew families, there has always been a saying in China: “Teochew areas favor boys over girls.”

I used to believe this statement. However, after several years of visits and observations, I gradually overturned my idea that “Teochew people favor boys over girls.” On the contrary, I now even think that the people who can really “say things” in Teochew families are Teochew women, especially mothers.

Dad may have money, but mother has “power”

In traditional Teochew families, fathers often play the role of going out to make money. While mothers are responsible for taking care of all matters within the family, including: sacrifices, housework, taking care of the whole family, and at the same time playing the role of maintaining relatives. It can be said that the “position” of mother is “omnipotent” in Teochew areas.

Because of this, mothers have “power”.

For example, when a child is hungry, he always says: “Mom, I’m hungry”, not “Dad, I’m hungry.” When a child gets into trouble, the first person to tell is definitely “Mom”, not Dad. When a child needs to pay tuition, he or she will definitely ask the mother for money, not the father. Whether a boy or a girl grows up, the closest person is still the mother, including choosing a marriage partner, the mother’s opinion is always more important than the father’s.

Filial piety is a duty, and it is also the “imperial sword” of Teochew mothers

To put it inappropriately, the “father” in a Teochew family is like a worker bee, responsible for the source of income and has the role of a guard, but will not be the “decision maker”. “Father” had better not “make a mistake”, because the mother has the right to complain to the parents-in-law. A “mother” who is filial to the parents-in-law is impeccable and has a supreme status. Even if one day the husband really proposes a divorce, the parents-in-law will often protect this “mother” more than their own son.

Where there is a mother is home

Where there is tide, there are Teochew people. Teochew people have a tradition of going out to make a living. In terms of population distribution, there are 10 million Teochew people living in the Teochew region of China. There are 10 million Teochew people living in China outside the Teochew region. There are 10 million Teochew people living outside of China.

No matter where they go, Teochew wanderers always miss their hometown the most. Teochew food restaurants can be seen everywhere in China, such as Teochew food stalls, Longjiang pork leg rice, etc. If you pay attention, you may often hear such a sentence “It is delicious, but not as delicious as my mother’s cooking.”

It can be said that every Teochew mother is a master of cooking. Perhaps it is a talent. They can master the complex skills passed down from generation to generation. Almost every mother in the Teochew area can make “kueh” with ancient Chinese characteristics.

Teochew mothers’ children have grown up under the feeding of “Michelin” star-level “chefs”, so it is inevitable that they are “picky”. For Teochew wanderers, the temptation to go home is probably the dishes made by their mothers!

Summary: Women are the most important role in a family

After seeing so many Teochew families, most of them are husbands and wives following each other. However, Teochew women may seem weak, but their inner strength is stronger than men. It can be described as “women are as good as men”.

I can’t help but sigh that women are the most important role in a family, especially mothers. They may not have much work experience, and their advantages in the workplace may not be as strong as men, but their role in the family is indeed irreplaceable.

In terms of children’s education alone, family education, precept and example, mothers are the leaders of family education. Their words and deeds enlighten their children and also affect their children’s lives.

Many married men are complaining about the difficulty of work, and they all think that women’s role at home is very easy.

Here, although as a man, I have to “betray” men and say a fair word: making money may not be easy, but the work of a housewife is not only more difficult, but also more important. Therefore, I hope that husbands all over the world will cherish their wives, be more considerate, and complain less.